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As most of you know from reading this blog or knowing me personally online or personally, I’ve been entertaining myself for years not just that the world cannot continue for much longer - civilization, humankind, all or most life on earth, or even the existence of the planet, but the number of ways, their immanence, their probability, and evidence that these are in their early stages, but just how many of these existential threats there are. Given their number, how most of them are related to the current objective situation, it’s only a short matter of time before one of them happens. It’s a matter of which one gets here first.

Well, today, I got religion. I found something in the Bible which could save the world.

There are now about 7.3 billion people alive on the planet. The Bible (Matthew 24:36) says that no one can predict the day or hour (of the end). Paraphrased

So, the solution is simple! Everyone alive on the planet just needs to predict a different day and hour of doomsday. As there are 8766 day and hour combinations in each year, that would put off the end of the world for 832,000 years! If just 10,000 people make such a prediction every year, the end of the world would stay postponed into the future.

Simple, eh? Who says overpopulation is any sort of problem?

I guess if I believed in the Bible, I could go along with the Tea Party climate deniers, the nukes-are-not-a-problem (because humans cannot destroy god’s creation), those who believe that there’s an infinite amount of fresh water, and those who believe tech will save us from whatever existential threat looms and accept it.

I might use it on Christians who are worried about being required to get the mark of the beast tattooed on or implanted with a chip by Obama, or that Obama is the antichrist, sufferers of other forms of Obama Derangement Syndrome ™, that the current pope is the antichrist, or some astronomical event was foretold by somebody that means the end.

Footnote: This is a secular blog, not an endtimes blog, and I will not entertain discussions of religion, prophecy, or scriptures of any kind. In other posts, I may discuss whether and how religion itself could work toward the demise of life as we know it.

I got a comment from “Mike” on this. He’s got a better plan:

However, there is a monkey wrench I intend to throw into your line of thinking… It is not us who gets to predict the end of the world. We are quite egocentric if we consider ourselves to be the only species with this amazing power.

I propose two different hypothesis here. First, my little dog clearly knows when the end of the world is coming. She can predict it down to within a few minutes. All you need to do is get her leash and mention groomer of veterinarian and she cowers in fear knowing that life as she knows it is about to end.

Therefore, it could be dogs who will share with us their deeper understanding of the time and space. However, I personally would prefer to experience an end which is predicted by a golden retriever than that imagined by a Doberman. I suspect their personalities play a role in the reality they imagine.

My other theory of trans-species prognostication must revolve around the lowly groundhog. This delightful little rodent is world renowned for its prognosticatory prowess with planetary climatology. We consult with one of their ambassadors each year in a worldwide watched event held in Pennsylvania. However, other nations and states also consult with representatives of the kingdom of Rodents in order to achieve similar insights. Now, if a groundhog has this ability to see into the future up to six weeks in advance and can prognosticate that well when suffering from suddenly being awakened from hibernation, then the possibilities are nearly infinite that with a full seasons sleep and when fully awake and given plenty of tobacco leaves and coffee beans to munch on, that these little quantum wormholes may be able to tell us the exact moment of time in which time stops.

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I claim no particular training or knowlege in any field, These opinions do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Web-lectric, my nation, my state, the California Department of Furniture and Bedding, FEMA, anyone or everyone else, or even myself.

Nothing in this site is designed to give any sort of advice. Any advice is pretty useless anyway, whether giving such advice or acting on any advice. Do so at your own risk\k\s\i\r\ certainty that disaster will ensue from the offering or use of any advice, for no good deed ever goes unpunished.

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